One minute I held the key next the walls were closed on me. And I discovered that my castles stand upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand (Viva La Vida - Coldplay)

You would all know one line from this song ........ 'I hear Jerusalem bells a-ringing' and I bet you, like me, always sing that bit.  As always, enjoy.

Monday: Today I have kept myself in the moment and when I need to, concentrated on my breathing. It helped and Monday has been completed. On my own tonight as Andy is out with friends.  So a quiet night for me, in my room, listening to music and reading. I had a surprise text message from my friend Ian (who I know from Stoke's Meet Up and we often meet up when he is passing through London). I read it at work and it really brightened my day as he is Montreal on holiday.  I told the crazy fool to just forget about me and enjoy Canada!

I have received quite a few messages the past few days from people. Jackie in NZ, dear Margaret in Stoke who sends me the most beautiful photographs of her garden, Cherise, Jenny and Jackie back in Stoke who have messaged me to touch base and dear Fabio in Belgium and PPLP my French friend here in London and Kim who I worked with at Stafford.  I am feeling very loved and feel blessed.  

Tuesday:  I opened my bedroom curtains this morning and was greeted with a plan swooping around The Shard on its approach to Heathrow. I actually said 'Welcome to London'. It amazes me how graceful planes can look as they cut through the skyline.

Tonight Andy and I were out at the BBC (again) for a freebie. We had a lovely meal (our favourite) at Wahaca. I just love the food there and there is always a good selection.  So tonight we were off to see a recording of a BBC Four show called 'It's Not What You Know'. The main reason we were going was to see Joe Lycett who was hosting it.  Joe Lycett first come to my knowledge after watching him on 8 of of 10 Cats - Countdown, when he told such a funny story, the thought of it now just makes me laugh.

The show was not a disappointment.  I guess in Joe's words, it is very much like Mr and Mrs. Three 'celebs' are asked questions and their nominated friend answers them with hopefully the correct answers (the friend's answers are recorded). Tonight's panel were: Mae Martin, Adrian Chiles and Zoe Lyons. Joe weaved his magic and humour and it really was funny.  I have decided that if I need yet another gay friend (I feel like I am Kylie at times ........ and she dates younger guys) Joe would be it. He would be welcome at our flat any evening.

Bus home and we were both so tired but it really was a good evening and I look forward to hearing the show when it is broadcast.  Thank you BBC for a free and really entertaining night out.

Wednesday:  I am so tired this week, I have no idea why but hey I made it to hump day with out committing murder so all is well.  Yoga tonight. I worked really hard and it was all going so well until he said we were going to be upside down and all my insecurities of being the fat kid returned.  My face must have shown it as the tutor looked at me and said it was ok if I did not want to.  So once again, me and another woman watched as the rest of the class were up on their shoulders.  I did feel slightly better when a woman (size 8) could not do it whilst another woman (size 18) had no problem. The size 8 woman eventually managed it with help from the tutor. I think I am scared. So I now have a week not to beat myself up about it but to get the courage to give it a go as inverted yoga poses are a must.  Initially, you learn this pose by using a wall.  Andy, bless him, said we could practice at home but I am scared in case I hurt myself. So positive thoughts this week because I know I will feel so good WHEN I do it.

Needless to say, I felt good after my lesson and even more tired, so actually slept like a baby. I have no idea why we say that as Megan never slept well. She is (was) like her Mum, frightened to miss anything!

Thursday:  Almost there. I had a meeting today and the woman come out to the reception area and said something so lovely.  She said 'I just knew you were Karen, you had such a welcoming and happy face, I could tell by your smile it was you'.  This fills my heart with so much joy that I still have some sparkle, well for the right people.

Home alone tonight, which is good as I have not blogged since Monday. So caught up with that and my washing and cooked a stir fry for dinner. The weeks are passing by so quickly and I thought today that I really should book a few days away somewhere. I know I have had time of ill, but I need a break, especially as I am feeling better.  I have no idea where I would like to go, Italy maybe or Denmark. I will have to think and get something sorted or it will be the school holidays again before we know it.

Friday:  Well done Karen! You survived the week. You did not kill a soul and all is well.  Actually booked five days off work in June.I did toil with the idea of actually going to grab some sunshine somewhere, but I have no idea where I would like to go or if when I get there, I would feel comfortable watching the world going round in couples or families.

Highlight of today was the new tumble dryer.  Which I must say is a great deal quieter than the old one, but a sad reflection on my life!  Andy and I sat and watched Game of Thrones tonight and just chilled as I drawled over John Snow aka Kit Harrington.  I really can't think why I do this.  I mean, he does not tick any of my boxes ............ sigh!  I have more chance of waking up tomorrow finding myself being a size 8 than to meet anyone who looks vaguely like that! Ain't life a bitch!

As always, with my love!