How do you think I'm going to get along without you when you're gone? You took me for everything that I had and kicked me out on my own. Are you happy, are you satisfied? How long can you stand the heat? (Another One Bites The Dust - Queen)

The irony of this song is two fold.  Firstly, it was number one when I got married the first time. That alone should have been an omen. Secondly, in light of Friday's events the words seem significant.  I am a woman and I will always vote and I am the first one to speak out for democracy.  However, I am finding it very difficult to understand why people have used their vote purely because they do not like immigration.  Mainly immigration from non EU countries.  I shall say no more, just that I have learnt a great deal about people today (Friday) and it is a sad day.  Try to enjoy!

Monday:  Such a lovely feeling knowing I had no work today, well no work there ever again!  Andy was up early and was making his way to try to resurrect his phone ........ good luck with that one!  More (of his) washing put on and I had no plans to leave the flat until later on during the day, so it was time for chores and paperwork.  The sun finally come out and so did I and caught the bus to my favourite gallery in London - Tate Britain.

When I lived up north and it was a wet and cold Sunday afternoon, I used to dream about just popping over to the Tate to see the Pre-Raphaelite art, just to be able to mooch around the gallery. So today, once again I did.  The Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood have always been of interest to me. I think it was because they were pioneers of their time, pushing those boundaries and taking art and shaking it up. Wonderful pieces of art.  However, the irony of it all come home to me as I walked down the steps from the gallery, because as I looked over the river I could see my new office.  I had not made the connection, but I will be able to sit at my desk (well the days I go into the office) and see Tate Britain from my window.  How crazy is that; another circle completed.

All good at my new work place and actually got met at the lift by my boss (she will be leaving in September though to change careers) with a smile and a hug. We completed the necessary paperwork and I was introduced to some of my work colleagues; all very positive.  So I walked home along the Embankment with Parliament to my left, then turning right and walking through the gardens at the Imperial War Museum and back to my flat.  The rest of the evening was seeing England (sign) try to score a goal.  I guess some things never change.

Tate Britain

The amazing floor at Tate Britain

Tuesday:  It is funny how the negative impact of one aspect of your life can shape the rest of it.  I had a fantastic day today.  I met with a friend and she is a friend even though this is only the second time we have met.  I should have been managing this person in my old job but as soon as we saw each other we knew we would get along!  How cool is that.  I met her at her flat which is a fabulous part of London and we walked over to Covent Garden and had a great lunch in a really good Italian restaurant.  We chatted and chatted and laughed and laughed.  Christine gave me a gift for my new job.  Talk about someone who you have only just met you gets you.  She gave me a book called Tired of London, Tired of Life and it gives you something to do in London for every day of the year!  So me.  We popped in M&S and then walked back to Christine's flat for a cup of tea and more chatting and I eventually left at 6.30pm! We both could not believe the time. We have so much in common and I know that we shall be meeting up again really soon.  

I really do feel like things are starting to come together.  I attend a few Meet Up groups which I love and have made some good friends there.  I have Hannah and Emma (who I met at meditation) who have become such good friends. I now have met Christine.  There is Daniele my Italian friend and dear PPLP (Pepe) my French friend.  I do not want to temp fate but also I will meet new people starting a new job.  It is all feeling really positive.

So I sat with a rather nice gin and tonic and watched Game of Thrones.  Well when I say watch it, I watched it through my fingers as it was a blood bath - but so, so good.  It is all good.

Wednesday:  So this morning I started to throw a few things into my suitcase as it is not long now until I go to Barcelona and I have a busy few days ahead. For the life I me I cannot find my old faithful sandals.  I have looked everywhere (and let's face it the flat is not that big) except my wardrobe and the thought of pulling that is is to much to think about today.  So today I caught up on paperwork - new DBS for job but thankfully I can start before this one comes back.  

So tonight I was meeting my new friend The Man.  You may recall we met at a recent Meet Up and he is from Wales and is a Primary School Teacher.  So off I trot on the bus up to Liverpool Street and I have to say I must have fallen love/lust 50 in five minutes.  Oh my.  Then a gorgeous guy come over and asked if he could ask me some questions. I thought, fill your boots sunshine. Him and some friends were starting a new business and wanted some feedback on the names they were thinking of calling said business. We did laugh as I gave him my thoughts on said names.  I was going to give him my card and ask him to let me know what they did call it but decided not to.

I met The Man down on the station and I do not know what was going on but there was a huge police presence.  I guess I forget that the country is on high alert as I just get on with it.  We said our hellos and walked up to Spitalfields to a lovely pub and sat and drunk, sharing stores and laughing.  It was so lovely. We both thought that it was time to get something to eat so I thought about a curry, so off we went to Brick Lane.

Brick Lane is full of curry restaurants and competition is fierce.  We were just passing one and the bloke come out and ushered us in.  To be honest, I think the choice was so overwhelming we would still be there now making up our minds.  I had a vegetable madras, he had a lamb something or the other.  Of course he did, he is Welsh.  It was so funny as The Man said that he thought we had known each other for years and I felt the same. The conversation and laughter just flowed.  I love this when I hear this.  Christine said the same on Wednesday.  I like it because I remember saying to Megan once 'if I am so terrible, so bad why doesn't everyone else see that?' and her reply was 'because you are good at covering it up'.  I know this is not true, but when you sometimes have that little wobble of faith in yourself to get such a natural acceptance from others just reassures me that I am a good person.

We left the restaurant and said that we will definitely do it again and said our goodbyes and went our separate ways.  The rain started and I could see lightening across the skyline - I do not like storms. The heavens opened and the rain was bouncing off the road. I bus hopped and fortunately did not get very wet at all, which was amazing considering how the rain was coming down. Quick catch up with Andy and straight to bed. However, the storms come and the sky was full of lightening.  I laid in my bed wanting to look out of the window but to scared to open the curtains.  I was born in a storm (almost at midnight as well) so obviously this has had an impact on me ha ha.  Finally, snuggled down and was soon safe in the arms of Orpheus.   

Thursday:  London is so humid today.  I thought after the terrible storms last night they air would be fresher; it was not.  I ventured out to the bank and it was closed because of flooding. So went off to vote and got wet as it started to rain again. Went to collect some clothes I had ordered in the sale and then back on the tube to Waterloo.  Big mistake.  Waterloo was so busy as most of the trains had been cancelled.  I was only going one stop to Vauxhall.  

Finally, got to Vauxhall and to Andy's office (and soon to be my new office too) and spent an hour with the LGBT+ group making banners for Pride.  It really is so strange as I know more people there who are so lovely and chat away to me as if they have known me for years, than I ever did in my old job.  I guess that speaks volumes.  Anyway, quite pleased with my art attempt. Oh, oh to be creative.

Back home and tried said clothes on and gave Andy an impromptu fashion show. Every woman should live with a gay man. He was honest with my purchases and actually paid attention to them.  He is happy as he nipped up to Covent Garden to the Apple shop and now has a new phone. Balance has been restored.  So tomorrow I have to return to my old job, just for the day. I feel nothing. I am not apprehensive; nor am I excited. I feel nothing.  I guess time will tell.


Friday: What a shit day! Hardly any sleep as I watched the country implode. We are no longer in the EU! Unbelievable. I struggled originally with this vote, I cannot lie. But I read, listened, asked and thought and when I saw the hatred amongst people and immigration my mind was made up.  It is a sad day and I have seen some other people in a completely different light.  If I could, I would leave this country, we are more divided now as a nation than we have ever been.

So off to work for my last day.  I was not disappointed or surprised. It was at a conference and my name was not on the list, people as in work colleagues, could not look at me.  Thankfully, once again, volunteers and a couple of staff were sincere.  Things that should have been addressed were not and if I had known this I would have take the day off without pay. Photos were being taken at the end and I just put on my jacket and walked out of the door. I am so relieved that such an awful experience has finished.  I put Elbow on my phone, put my sunglasses on and walked - not looking back.

Spent the evening watching the news; trying to look forward to my new career but fearful of the country's future; the future for young people.  

As always, with my love x